from Starstruck

Jessie’s overthinking frequently gets the better of her … can she stop letting anxiety drive people away?

In the early days of a new relationship, it’s not unusual for people to dissect every text and phone call for the most tenuous scrap of meaning.

But if that behavior continues beyond the first “will they or won’t they” days, it can prohibit you from forming the type of foundation that is needed for a healthy relationship.

If you are an overanalyzer, it’s likely the you jump to conclusions that may have no basis in fact. You might see an item of clothing or a handwritten card and immediately assume that your new paramour is two-timing and untrustworthy – while the truth is likely to be far more mundane.

Trying to read into the word choices, body language, tone of voice, and facial cues of another person also keeps you emotionally distanced from them. You can’t sink into the intimacy of a  burgeoning relationship if you are preoccupied with fear or insecurity.

Nobody wants to be hurt, and this reluctance to be fully emotionally available is an understandable coping mechanism. But it’s also likely to keep you from getting what you really want: a warm, loving, intimate relationship where your brain can finally relax and be loved.

"I'm unraveling mentally. I think."

Myth busting

MYTH: Staying on guard and watchful all the time will keep you from getting hurt.

TRUTH: Staying on guard keeps you isolated from the type of heartfelt connections you desire. Trust and vulnerability are the scary-but-crucial keys to finding true intimacy.

You are strong enough to survive the possibility of being hurt.

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Am I Overthinking?

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