Apr 10

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The first boy who touched my breasts

(Yes, the title is entirely accurate and I also promise this post is completely PG-13. 🙂 )

When it came to dating and sex, I was a very slow starter.  By the time I went to college, I’d kissed a boy but that was it. My freshman year I had two dates – one was the most disastrous blind date ever (a great story for another time), and the other was a complete bust.

By the beginning of my sophomore year, I was wondering if I would ever kiss a boy again, let alone do anything else.

And then I walked into acting class.  We all giggled that the teacher might have something other than pure motives, because our first exercise was to get on stage in front of the whole class to mime taking a full shower.  Yes, a FULL shower.  Clothes on, but nothing left out.  It was a bit of a legend around the theater building.

A couple of weeks later, he had us do an Adam and Eve exercise. We were paired up with someone of the opposite sex to improvise a scene about what it would have been like before The Fall – no language, no knowledge, no nothing.

I was paired with Sean, and we were the first couple up.

Let me back up here for a moment and say that Sean and I already knew each other – in fact, he was one of the first people I’d met on campus because we both took on-campus jobs in the financial aid office.  He seemed so cool that I never felt worthy to be his friend, but I liked him a lot and always felt comfortable with him.

Back to acting class – we get up in front of the class and start wandering around, exploring our space.  We were the ultimate “innocents”.  At some point, Sean came into my space and “noticed” my breasts and started feeling them.  Then he’d feel his own chest, then mine.  Then his, then mine.  I refrained from reciprocating on HIS anatomy…I was far too shy.  🙂

The whole thing was completely asexual.  But it was also a hell of a lot of fun to be that free!

As time went on, Sean became one of the stars of our theater program – deservedly so.  We circled in the same orbits, but were never particularly close.

I remember one night during a cast party of some sort, he was pretty sloshed and sat down in my lap and said, “You know why I like you?  Because your name is Leah, and if you spell it backwards, it says Heal.  And that’s just like you.”  I’m sure he didn’t remember it in the morning, but it always stuck with me.

The fantastic Sean Dugan

We graduated from college and stayed in touch occasionally.  I subletted his apartment for a couple of months in New York while he was out of town.  Our orbits got wider, and although we were both part of the professional theatrical community, we saw less and less of each other.  When I left New York, we dropped out of touch almost completely.  Other than finding each other on Facebook a while ago, we haven’t talked in years.

Imagine my delight the other night when I was catching up on episodes of the NBC show “Smash” and I saw the name Sean Dugan go by in the opening credits.  Could that be my old friend Sean?  I figured it had to be since there are rules against multiple people using the same professional name.

I watched the show, and it was indeed that Sean.  Playing a wonderfully sleazy agent.  Still looking just the same, bringing up all the same affection.  I’m eager to see if his character will show up again.

In the meantime, I’m reminded of some very sweet college memories of the first boy who ever felt me up.  🙂

About the author

Leah Carey

Leah Carey is the Chief Miracle Officer of The Miracle Journal, where she writes about the large and small miracles that happen in her life every day. She is a life coach, speaker, journalist, freelance writer, and lover of life. In all of those pursuits, she works with people to identify what’s already right in your life so you can build an even more joyful and fulfilling daily experience from that foundation. You can find her on Facebook, , Twitter, and YouTube.

Permanent link to this article: https://www.leahcarey.com/themiraclejournal/2012/04/10/the-first-boy-who-touched-my-breasts/


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  1. Deb

    Love it! I guess you are “breast” friends – oh, that was a boob of a joke 🙂

    1. Leah Carey

      Hahahahahaha!!!! Love it, Deb! 🙂

  2. Sheila Callaham

    …and he’s CUTE, too! Lucky you!
    Sheila Callaham recently posted at their blog…Discover what I have through coaching others!

    1. Leah Carey

      True, Sheila. 🙂

  3. Jennifer Adamson

    I love reading your stories!

    1. Leah Carey

      Thanks Jen. 🙂

  4. Jeanette Sandor

    Leah, Love the story. The headlines really got my attention and your writing keeps my attention. Great post!
    Jeanette Sandor recently posted at their blog…Raising an appreciative child

    1. Leah Carey

      Thanks Jeanette! It’s great to have you here! 🙂

  5. Bethany

    And I thought you’d be excited ’cause Terry was on the episode. 🙂

    1. Leah Carey

      I didn’t realize that until AFTER I wrote this last night. 🙂 When I finished writing, I turned on this week’s episode and saw that both Sean AND Terry were in it – bonanza! I’m guessing we’ll see each of them at least another couple of times. Do you know any of the dancers? I’ve been keeping my eyes pealed, but I haven’t recognized anyone that I know yet.

  6. Martha

    Leah, loved your story! My flowering took time as well – so I can surely relate! Anyway, now you can confirm what a small world it really is:) I hope you guys keep in touch….it’s a wonderful journey with old friends!

    1. Leah Carey

      Thanks Martha. 🙂

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